Sunday, October 23, 2011

My career plan: Be a superhero

After watching Captain America (2011) movie, I finally understood what I want to be. I want to be a superhero! In fact I do have some skillsets required to be a superhero. I am short in height, like Peter Parker (Spiderman), or Logan (Wolverine) or Steve Rogers (Captain America). I like helping people but only when they ask for help. I am good at keeping a low profile and making excuses about my sudden absence at the most critical times (Superman, Batman, Spiderman). And I love watching superhero movies and reading their comic books.

So I spent my whole Sunday (i.e., yesterday) and devised a detailed set of steps I need to follow to embrace my destiny (career) as a full time superhero!

1. My Superpowers: I'll need something/someone radioactive enough to bite (Spiderman) or hit me (Hulk, DareDevil). So I need to be in US for something like this to happen. That's why I have started preparing to switch job to another company in which I'll get to stay for few months onsite immediately on my joining (I'm ready to settle for less pay for quick onsite opportunity). So if you know of such an opportunity, do let me know. BTW, I'm a software engineer, in case you haven't already figured out.

2. My Love: I'll need to make an exhaustive list of all the girls I've ever had crush on, since school days till today, starting with friends, then acquaintances, then almost strangers. After that I'll have to start meeting them, in the order written in the list because I've observed that once a person becomes a superhero, even if the girl is unaware of it, she'll somehow show more interest in that guy.

3. My Sacrifice: I'll have to lose someone very close to me that should make me swear to eradicate evil and crimes. This will be the hardest of all and quite tricky. But we all make sacrifices for our career. So I've decided, I'll remove one of my closest friends from my facebook friends list. Will pick a chit to decide the name.

4. My uniform: This is what will define me and put me into the character. I love wearing ties (like Doctor Who), so ties are mandatory. I also want to have a cape (Superman, Batman). Rest could be anything but within the limits of decency and should be socially acceptable as I'll be running around and fighting crimes during daytime also.

5. My online presence: Interested volunteers please write your e-mail id in the comments and I may get back to you in case required. This will be voluntary work, no compensation will be given. But c'mon, its the experience that counts! You'd be like my sidekick, a superhero's sidekick! You can include that in your resume and add me as one of your references.

I don't need to tell you where to find me in case you need me... Facebook of course! Just post your request on my wall and I'll get back to you whenever I or my sidekick friend checks Facebook the next time! I shall regularly tweet my activities so that the criminals fear me (sadly only the educated ones with access to internet!) and my friends, the common people feel safe.

So if you find someone running on the streets like a madman wearing a torn shirt and holding his bermudas, then that would be the criminal I'd be chasing.


Anonymous said...

my e-mail id is .

And, yes i want you to be a superhero. :D. :P

Abhishek said...

Thank you Divenita. :)

Anonymous said...

Good one man :)

Abhishek said...

Thanks Manish. :)