Monday, April 28, 2008

Change: The past and the present, Part I

When I look back at those 19 years of my life, and compare myself as what I was earlier and what I am now, I feel that I've changed significantly. Of course, I won't include my height and looks, as those things have hardly changed.

1. I waste infinitely less amount of food now a days as compared to when I was staying at home. What exactly happened I don't know but I have changed, and it's for good.

2. I don't talk for hours over the phone. At home, since we have to pay fixed rates for one month use of phone connection, so I sometimes talked a lot over it, but slowly this habit also wore off, like the previous one.

3. I used to be uncomfortable with talks about sex and similar issues, but then one fine day I realized that all these things are a part of nature and a part of what we are. Its foolish to ignore these things (of course my friends advised me a lot on this issue).

4. Another issue was abuses. I despised people who used abusive language. It took me a long time to make friends with them and get comfortable in their company. Some of them are excellent people and were my good friends, which made me realize that using abusive language doesn't make someone bad. Its just a way to vent out all frustration and what I realized as a result of that, was bad for me... since I never abused, all my frustration got collected within me, and I got all sorts of weird thoughts, and sleeptime dreams and I also slept more than required. (I still don't abuse anyone and so sleep a lot and still have weird thoughts and dreams.) But I've accepted abuses as a part of life. Now a days I interpret their meaning and tell people that if such things happened in reality then...

5. I had limited exposure to music at home, but after coming to college, I have started listening to different kinds of music and now I know what kind of music I like (the names, like "rock", "alt rock" etc.)

6. Now a days I have bath (almost) regularly, but till a couple of years ago, I had bath sometimes, not regularly. Seriously, I felt lazy to go and have a bath, but while bathing, I used to feel nice. Winters was another reason!

7. I was afraid of the dark. I used to watch all those horror TV series, "aahat", "Zee Horror Show" etc. and then used to tremble in the dark, feeling presence of ghosts all around me. I could not stay in the dark, even with people around me. But then, after I stopped watching those TV serials, the fear disappeared. But when I saw, "The Ring", that fear came back, but it wasn't fear of staying in the dark, it was fear of being alone. (Ghosts scare person who's alone, its convenient for them that way, chun chun ke daraate hai).

8. I used to get frustrated about small things in life, about small issues. Now it has lessened. Lower grades, bad performance, etc. used to frustrate me. I used to behave rudely with others, but I think that has also lessened, now that I've realized that I've reached 7th semester and CGPA won't make much of a difference now! :D
But sadly, even now a days I do get frustrated during exam days when I'm ill prepared! :(

9. Now for some bad changes, I've started chatting a lot, especially on gtalk, and have got addicted to orkut, a lot!

10. My sense of humor has gone from bad to worse. I become desperate to crack jokes that I try to use anything anyone says and comment on it, and many times its not amusing, and mostly confusing!

11. Something that hasn't changed as yet, is my social phobia.


Bhanukiran said...

Transition is inevitable friend, anyways I never thought about all these points [:O] , good post

Devansh Mittal said...

I like your honest and innocent expression. Your posts are good. I have been in the very much similar situations as yours when I was in college.
Its good to know about you. We might talk sometime, I will share my similar experiences too.

Prateek G V said...

totally agree with what devansh sir has written :) .

priyali said...

acceptin that u`ve changed is a big thng itself ;), keep writing!

nauty said...

You should thank your roommate who was in some way behind your evolution :D